I should begin by saying, I love vegetables. Green ones, orange ones, leafy ones, stalky ones, root ones…you get the picture. At an Italian restaurant, Contorni is the first heading my eyes eagerly skip to, and I have been known more than once to assemble a meal for myself of one or two delicious veggie sides, along with a dish starring my best friend/arch nemesis, the potato.
Why do I love vegetables? Who can explain why our tastebuds send the messages to our brains that they do? Perhaps it all started in those formative tastebud years, when my Grandma, the world’s greatest cook, (sorry, Lidia…you know I still love you) would prepare an abundance of veggies for me dressed perfectly with garlic and olive oil. Maybe my mother filled her plate with them while she was carrying me. Maybe it’s psychological – the knowledge of filling my body with all those beautiful little phytonutrients and anti-carcinogens (that Dr. Weill tells us we can’t get enough of) making the food that much more delicious. Although, if deliciousness were a gauge of health, Ben & Jerry’s Oatmeal Cookie Chunk would probably cure cancer.
To be clear, I’m no vegetarian. I tried it to be trendy for about 6 months in high school, but caved in to a 2am snack attack of Denny’s Chili Nachos one winter night while my first gay friend, Lionel, made the appropriate ooohing and gasping sounds to properly acknowledge the drama of my relapse into carnivoredom. To sum up myself as an eater, I’d have to say I am 30% Park Sloper (health-nut), 20% American (rare, please), 10% foodie, 20% Italian-American (everything tastes better with garlic), 15% New Englander (clambake!), and 5% Irish (that’s the part that drinks the beer…if you care to challenge that percentage, you’d best have photos to back up your claim). All in all, I am a person who loves to eat and drink, and since one can only log so many minutes on the elliptical machine, I always managed to balance my love of food and quest for good health by satiating myself with large servings of my beloved veggies. I carried on this way quite nicely for some time, until something very unexpected happened…I fell in love with a man who hates vegetables.
And thus we begin our journey. Whether you are reading this blog from it’s inception, or joining us at a later date, my intent is to share with you the trials, tribulations, and general wackiness that ensue while trying to trick my husband into eating vegetables. Thrown in, for good measure, will be some humorous background stories from our dating days, as well as some stories I have heard from before my dear husband ever met me. And, less anyone doubt that this is, indeed, a FOOD blog, I will take you through the menus and recipes I prepare along the way.
4 comments
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February 21, 2007 at 9:40 pm
Princess Winifred
I’m “hungry” for more!
November 18, 2008 at 10:14 am
Hazel Brazle
I am loving this already. I broke off an engagement to my soulmate and it all revolved around this issue. I am a mother of one (5), and he a father of 2 (9 and 14). He hates veggies and intail so does his kids. We broke up for 2 years and I have date another guy, only to find that I was comparing him to my ex. We just got back together in November and this issue came up last night. He loves to eat Mac-n-Cheese, made by me of course, with maple syrup. I mean half of a pan, in one setting. He does work out a lot and looks incredible, but it is not good to eat all that cheese and no greens. I have let it go and decided with him last night to just cook and let everyone eat what they want. Except my little one who will eat her veggies. I love him to death, but I don’t want this habit to be the death of him and the kids. I am in to taking small steps for long term changes.
January 15, 2009 at 12:12 am
Kregg
veggies are what food eats.
not to mention, broccoli = evil which I can prove…
Some where someone has a brother named Edward, so logically, change the ‘bro’ to the letter ‘e’…
Some where in all of history in the known and unknown entire universe, there is a chance that ‘cco’ some how represents the letter ‘v’. Just like the ‘no two snow flakes are alike; prove otherwise…’ so we now change ‘cco’ to the letter ‘v’…
Now, being math is the key to the universe, we simply use the reciprocal of ‘li’ and make it thus: ‘il’
Obviously spelling out the true hidden meaning of what broccoli really is… Evil!
veggies killed everything that ate it in time. The dinosaurs except the meat eating ones who eat the vegetarian ones which explains for their death.
The greatest people in all history having eaten vegetables have died due to this. Julius Ceaser, the man who had a salad named after him was cursed with death!
al-Saladin from the crusades, had it in his name… al-Saladin, aka, evil salad eater… which resulted in his death eventually.
Constantine the Great ate a vegetable once in his life… result… DEATH!
I appeal to you, veggies kill.
And the sad thing is, every time I try using this rationality with my wife, she just laughs and gives me this look… therefore, veggies also possesses ones mind to not accept rational thought.
When I was a kid and used this same argument, my Grandmother would just wash my mouth out with soap, so the degree of violence that veggies causes to its consumers does vary.
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